


You Belong With Me

by Last_Hope_For_Humanity



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Crying, Depression, Drabble, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-11
Updated: 2015-05-11
Packaged: 2018-03-30 02:23:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3919303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Last_Hope_For_Humanity/pseuds/Last_Hope_For_Humanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Somewhere along the line, Dan fell for his best friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Belong With Me

**Author's Note:**

> Kinda based on the song, kinda not.

Dan didn't know exactly when he fell for his best friend. He knew that it wasn’t some “love at first sight” crap. It was something that just hit him and never went away. If he had to guess though, he would say it’s been around three years, and when it comes to getting someone to date him, he’s usually quite confident. It’s not like he thought he could get anyone; he just didn’t let the nerves bother him, but Phil was different. Phil was his best fucking friend and not to mention a boy. He knows Phil is bi, but that still doesn’t change the fact that it’s easier to date a girl.

He tried to hint to Phil multiple times, but Phil is oblivious as hell and most times Dan just wants to scream “I like you,” to his face. They’ll hold hands, Dan will rest his head on Phil’s shoulder, and in the end Phil puts it off as platonic.

Dan doesn’t understand how Phil doesn’t know when Dan’s been single ever since they became friends and a lot of girls like Dan. He’s been asked out multiple times, by really nice girls too, but he can’t date someone who isn’t Phil. It wasn’t right to date a girl just to get over Phil, so he declined. Phil hasn’t bothered to ask either; he just goes on with his life. Not even when Phil asks Dan if he has a crush on anyone and Dan doesn’t respond. He just nods like he understands and doesn’t push it. Sometimes Dan wishes he’d push it, because Dan knows that he’d tell him. He hates lying to Phil, so he doesn’t. Phil is the only person he spills everything to and he’ll tell himself to keep it in, but he goes and tells Phil anyways. It’s just Phil never asked if he liked him, so he doesn’t tell him. It’s not lying, so it’s okay.

~

It’s Sunday and Dan is at Phil’s house again like always. It’s become a second home to him now, so he settles in Phil’s room like it’s his own and they talk. At first it’s the usual, like stupid dirty jokes and anime, but then Phil’s staring at the ceiling and he furrows his eyebrows.

“You okay?” Dan asks and Phil takes a deep breath. “I think I like someone,” Phil says and Dan gulps. “Oh,” Dan says simply. He’s panicking inside, the same as every time Phil has a new crush or gets a new girlfriend. It’s not fair, it should be him, but he has to be a good friend anyways. So, he fakes a smile and asks who it is. “Do you know who Lauren is?” Phil asks and Dan wants to cry, but he doesn’t. He holds it in and tries to keep a smile. He’s really glad that Phil is staring at the ceiling, because he knows Phil can sense when somethings wrong with him. “Uh, yeah. The one in our History class, right?” Dan asks and he has to wipe the tears forming in his eyes. He tries so hard to be subtle about. _Stop crying, you idiot!_ Dan tells himself and Phil just nods, still staring at the ceiling. “Uhh, yeah. We’ve been talking in Math and she’s really cool.” Dan doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t know how to without breaking, so he doesn’t. It’s silent for a moment until Phil breaks it. “I’m thinking of asking her out,” Phil says, not moving his eyes to look at Dan. He keeps his eyes fixated at the ceiling and he's completely still besides the small rise of his chest. Dan doesn't move either and his eyes start to sting. He knows he has to respond, so with a shaky voice that he barely composes he makes a small "oh."

Both stay silent for a moment and Dan really needs to get out of there before he breaks, so he grabs his backpack and Phil snaps his gaze over to him. "I uhhh gotta go," Dan says, taking all the strength he can muster to smile at Phil. "Okay, I'll text you," Phil says and Dan nods, before exiting.

He leaves Phil's house and rushes down the corner. His tears fall freely now and he continuously goes to wipe them away, but new ones form and god he needs to get home. He speed walks the rest of the way home and when he gets there he immediately looks down, avoiding his parents, walking straight to his room and throwing his backpack onto the ground. He immediately crashes himself onto the bed and he cries. His chest aches, his throat stings, and he wants to scream, but nothing comes out. He just whimpers and he feels like a huge coward, because he wasn’t suppose to be crying. He was meant to play if off cool, but he couldn’t, because he fucking loved Phil and this wasn’t fair. He was always there for him and they had all the same interests.

Whenever Phil felt even a little bit sad, Dan always knew how to cheer him up. They spent pretty much every waking moment together and yet not get sick of each other, except when Phil decided someone was better. He’d date some girl from their school and suddenly Dan would be pushed away. Not that Phil ever ditched Dan, but being the third wheel of the boy he loved and some other girl made him want to vomit. They’d hang out once or twice a week instead of six or seven, and Phil would spend that time talking about his girlfriend. It’s a cycle that repeated itself and every time Dan would cry like a fucking baby alone in his room.

He continued to cry like that until he couldn’t produce anymore tears and then he was just gasping for air. He was a fucking bloody mess and at the end of it, he just curled up into a ball and tried to steady his breathing.

His phone vibrated then and he immediately knew where it was from. He took a few steady breaths and with shaky hands he took out his phone. It was just a “hey,” and Dan didn’t know how he got the courage to message back, but he did. It was really hard to ignore Phil, even at times like these. He sniffled then and wiped the remaining tears from his face and sucked in the disgusting mucus that was threatening to leave his nostrils. God he needed a tissue.

Dan decided to get up then and he walked to the bathroom. When he got in there, he looked into the mirror, only to be disgusted by what he saw. He looked like someone had sucked the life out of him. His face was droopy and his eyes were beet red from all the crying.

He quickly splashed water in his face, which seemed to make it a little better. He sighed and got ready for bed, then residing into his room. He continued to text Phil, and he thanked god that Phil didn’t mention Lauren again. It was getting worse, every time Phil liked someone else. He doesn't know how he is going to keep it together, especially if they start dating. He’s going to have to tell Phil and the thought scared him. He knows Phil wouldn't mind, but that doesn't change the fact that afterwards it’s going to be awkward and they may drift apart. That thought alone made him want to vomit; he doesn't think he can live a life without Phil.

~

The next day when he see’s Phil, he forgets about Lauren, and talks to Phil like normal. They continue through the day like yesterday didn't happen and that makes Dan feel a little better. That is until lunch and Lauren sits next to Phil, right where Dan was suppose to sit, and he feels like dying. He walks up right behind Lauren and looks over at Phil, who mouths the word sorry. He fakes a smile and nods, sitting next to PJ instead. He doesn't speak and he just stares at his food, twisting his fork in it, not eating any, as he feels like he may vomit if he does. He continues to do this until PJ pokes him in the shoulder and he looks up. “You okay?” PJ asks and he looks over at Phil, who is completely transfixed in his conversation with Lauren to care that Dan exists. “I’ll uhh tell you later,” Dan tells him and he immediately regrets it, because now he knows something is wrong and he’ll have to tell him. PJ just nods and Dan gives him a small smile before he goes back to wallowing in his misery. He sometimes looks up to look at Phil and Lauren, who are definitely flirting. Jealousy flows through him and his sadness turns to anger, so he leaves. He bolts out of the lunch room, giving no explanation whatsoever, and he goes to the bathroom, hiding in there until the bell rings.

~

Dan goes to the rest of his classes like normal, but ignores his friends. He knows it’s not fair to them, but he wants to be alone right now, as he doesn't want to break in front of any of them.

He stares at the board blankly and doesn't move until class is over. He runs out the door and leaves without saying a word to anyone, but then he hears footsteps running towards him and he looks back to see Phil. He turns around, stopping dead in his tracks, and waits for him, as he knows running will just make the problem worse.

Phil runs up to him and takes a moment to catch his breath before speaking. “You...Uhhhh....What’s....Wrong,” he says between breaths. “I’m fine,” Dan says and Phil looks up at him and scoffs. “We both know that’s a lie,” he says and Dan bites his lip. “I’ve had a rough day, okay? Nothing to fret over.” “Obviously it is, because you always talk to me about your problems, whether you're having a bad day or not. The only other time you’ve done this was when your dog died freshmen year,” Phil says and Dan opens his mouth, but immediately closes it. He doesn’t know what to say, so he stares at the ground and shrugs. He feels tears welling in his eyes and he can’t look at Phil, because he knows he’ll cry again and he hates crying infront of people. He hasn’t done that since freshmen year and that was in front of his own mother. He never once in all the years he’s been friends with Phil, cry in front of him, especially when it was about him.  

He just stands there and he hears Phil sigh before putting his hand on Dan’s shoulder. “You don’t have to tell me now if you don’t want to, just let me be here for you, okay?” Dan mutters an “okay” and they leave at that. Phil pats Dan’s shoulder before taking away his hand and speaking. “Alright, you wanna go back to mine?” “Sure,” Dan says, nodding even though he knows he shouldn't. His mind is screaming at him to leave, but his body is begging him to say. He looks behind him, the way to his house, but follows Phil instead.

Phil talks immediately as they start to walk and Dan pretends to listen. Not that Dan is uninterested in what Phil has to say. It’s just hard to listen when all you want to do is speak. The words are stuck in his throat and his body feels like jello as he can barely move. His heart is beating a mile a minute and he can feel sweat start to form at his forehead. He wants to tell Phil. He needs to tell Phil, but he can’t.

His brain won’t let him. He knows that it will fabricate their relationship, but it’s hurting him and it's affecting the way he treats Phil. It’s been making him push Phil away and keep secrets from him. It wasn't right to treat Phil like that and he had a right to know how Dan felt about him, so before Dan could think about any further, he set himself up. He knew he was going to hate himself for this later, but he needed to do it. “You're right. I’m not fine,” he blurted out, even though Phil was in the midst of talking. “I’m not fine and I.....I....I've been keeping it in forever and it’s not right not to tell you.” Dan looks up at Phil then and he just looks at him. He wasn't going to tell him here. They were technically still in public and he wasn't going to make a scene, even though Phil had stopped walking.

“I’ll tell you when we get to your house. Just not here, please,” Dan says and he feels as if he’s going to fall. The nerves are almost too much for him to bare and all he wants is for them to go away. _Bad Idea. Bad Idea. Bad Idea._ His mind screams at him, but it’s too late. Phil has already nodded and their walking again. _YOU CAN STILL RUN!_ His brain yells at him, but he can’t. That would only make it worse and he knows for a fact that if Phil ran after him, he wouldn’t get very far. So, he follows Phil and tries to calm down while thinking of what he’s going to say. He’s rehearsed this moment a thousand times in his head, but now he couldn’t think. All the thoughts of what he was going to say were thrown out of his brain and he didn’t know what he was going to say. _Phil we’ve been friends forever and I..._ No that was so fucking stupid and Dan knew it. _You know Lauren?  Right well I may or may not be jealous of her, because she has all your attention, and I want that_. Fuck, no that made him sound clingy. Dan tried to think of more, but they were already at Phil’s house and they were walking to his room. It felt like only seconds, how were they here already?

Dan didn't even have time to debate over what was happening and just how fast the time was going by. Currently him and Phil were on Phil’s bed and Phil’s hand was on his shoulder again. “Take your time,” Phil said to him, rubbing his shoulder soothingly, waiting for Dan to speak.

Dan wanted to throw up in all honesty. He had set himself up and now he was going to have to tell him. He could lie sure, but he knows that wouldn't go by Phil. So, he swallows the lump in his throat and with a shaky voice, he spoke. “Soooo..... uuhh. This is really hard for me to say and I just hope you don’t hate me by the end this,” Dan says and Phil looks at him with such sympathy that Dan feels pathetic. “I could never hate you. Don’t be afraid. No matter what I’m here for you,” Phil says and his hand is still on his shoulder and he’s not sure if that’s making it better or worse, because god it feels hot. “Yeahhh, so umm I may or may not be jealous of uhhh your girlfriends, which is kind of like why I freaked out last night and at lunch,” he says and Phil’s hand leaves Dan's shoulder to in his lap. His face looks confused and Dan wants to say more, but the words are stuck in his throat again and Phil’s already speaking. “Wait, so you're jealous that I get girls? Like what about all the girls that like you? I don’t get it, why don’t you just-” “I’m not jealous of you,” Dan cuts him off, “I’m jealous of them,” He says, closing his eyes for a moment, clenching his fists together in his lap, taking a deep breath, before opening his eyes, looking straight forward as to not look at Phil and continuing.

“I sort of fancy you and I’m jealous of all the girls that can get all your attention, when it’s suppose to be me that you like, not them. AND I know that it’s messed up, because we’re suppose to be best friends and we share beds and what not, but I can’t help it and I’m so fucking sorry.” 

Dan closes his eyes again, putting his head in his hands. He feels so fucking stupid and he really hopes Phil doesn't hate him. A few tears go down his cheek and he knows he fucked up. Nothing was ever going to be the same that was for sure.

He winces when Phil puts a hand on his back and rubs lightly. "It’s okay," Phil says and Dan breaks. “You know fucking what. It’s not okay! It never will be. You fucking asshole. How do you expect me to get over this so quickly. Rejection fucking hurts, Phil. AND you can’t expect me to just be ‘okay’. Because I won’t be. I cry over you all the fucking time and it’s not fair that you can go around and date whoever you want, while I just sit here unable to get over you.” He starts to cry now and he’s looking at Phil who looks horrified and he feels so fucking bad, because it’s not Phil’s fault. It never was. “I’m sorry. Just- Phil. God, I’m unstable and I’m sorry I dragged you into this,” Dan says putting his hands over his eyes again in embarrassment. He’s such a horrible person and Phil will never forgive him.

He stays like that for a few moments before he hears the creek of the bed and Phil wraps him in a hug. His hands tightly embrace him and Dan puts his head in the crook of his neck, wrapping his arms around Phil as well.

He continues to cry, lightly, and it’s not long before he’s not crying at all. He just holds Phil and he knows by this that Phil doesn't hate him, which was more than he could ask for. He let the weight come off his chest and that’s all that counted.

He decided then that it was about time that he let go before he would never be able to, so he detached himself. He took a step back and let his hands fall to his side. Phil let go slightly, but still hung onto his shoulders, one of his hands going up to caress his cheek.

“You mean more to me than any stupid girl. Okay? and no matter what I will always love you,” Phil says and Dan nods even though he wants to retort and say but not in that way. He just nods and Phil smiles, patting his shoulder, and letting his hand fall to his side.

Dan feels like he’s been punched in the gut and it’s so fucking hard for him to smile when he knows he’s been rejected. He wants to let it go, he wants it to go back to normal, but for some reason his mind is an ass and he asks questions that he already knows the answer to. Questions that will probably hurt their relationship, but he does it anyways.

“Soo umm I’m guessing you never even thought about it?” Dan asks and he wants to kick himself. _What the fuck are you doing!?_ His mind yells, but it’s too late now, and Phil looks like he's at a loss for words. “Ummm....I’m not going to lie and say I haven’t. I actually had a crush on you for awhile, but...” Phil stops and Dan’s eyes sting again, and for once he’s glad he’s out of them. “But not anymore?” Phil looks confused and Dan can hear is his heart beat so loud in his ears, he feels as if Phil can hear it. He feels hot, way to hot, and this was it. Phil was going to tell him how he felt and Dan wasn’t sure if he could handle either situations. “I mean. Kinda. Like I got over you a little bit, but I’m not going to lie and say I have no feelings for you. I’m just not sure if it’s worth the risk. You know?” Phil says and Dan feels excited and hurt at the same. He doesn’t know what to say.

He’s not sure if the risk is worth it either, but his desire gets the best of him. “I think it is,” Dan says so quietly he doesn't know if Phil heard it not, but it doesn't matter. Dan already has his hand on Phil's cheek and god, he’s shaking.

He quickly places his lips on Phil’s and it’s not even really a kiss, it’s chaste and it lasts about a second. He keeps his eyes closed and their lips are less than a centimeter apart. Dan waits for any sign of discontentment and when he doesn't get one, he does it again. This time it’s not as small, he moves his lips, and so does Phil. It goes on like this, and after each break it gets faster, and then Phil’s tongue is in Dan’s mouth and he forgets how to breathe.

A moan comes out of his mouth and he can barely hold it together. His groin suddenly feels really tight in his pants and he’s out of breath. Dan finally breaks their kiss, but leaves his hands in place.

He’s really surprised that when he opens his eyes, he see’s Phil smiling at him, and then he feels a smile tug at his own lips. This was how it was suppose to be and Phil dove in for another kiss, but Dan put a hand in front of his lips. _WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THIS IS YOUR ONLY CHANCE!_ Dan’s brain yelled at him, but he had to do this. He needed to know if this was a one time thing or if they were going to try and be something more. He didn’t think he could go through with this if it was only one time, so he decided to ask Phil before it was too late.

“I ummm. I can’t go through with this if you're just gonna go to Lauren tomorrow or some other girl. If we’re going to do this, I wanna be ummm your boyfriend,” Dan says, biting his lip. He didn't want to go out right away and use the word boyfriend, but it came out and Phil’s laughing. “It’s not funny!” Dan says, hiding behind his hands, which only makes Phil pull him closer. “Sorry,” Phil says and he smiles at Dan and he feels like he’s going to melt right at the spot. “You’re cute when you're flustered,” Phil says and Dan can’t help the blush that forms on his cheeks. “Shut up!” Dan yells and Phil chuckles, pulling him even closer. Dan didn't know that was even possible and when Phil leaned into to kiss him, he couldn't help but smile into it.


End file.
